What Happened to Moving Forward !

Some days it feels like this planet is moving one step forward and five steps backward.

As a youth we watched such forward thinking series as Logans Run, Buck Rogers and Battlestar Gallactica, Star Trek, Star Wars and Lost In Space (all the original series).

Along with those there were the original reality shows such as Beyond 2000 and the science shows of the time. They were amazing and pretty much said that the USA was ahead of the curve in everything on earth.

Back then in the early 80’s the United States of America truly was the Super Power of the planet.

We looked up to them in all things motor vehicle, all things hotel and all things modern and futuristic.

W.T.F.!!!

And W.H.P.?

What Happened People?

Is it me or is the USA now several decades behind everyone else. I mean we know that their dollar has slipped back in to the 1970’s compared to other currencies but seriously, why does it have to be the only country on the planet that still uses miles instead of kilometres, pound s and ounces instead of kilograms and grams and why can’t they accept that we all use Celsius as a measurement for temperature instead of the antiquated Fahrenheit scale.

Come on…

Get with the game people.

We live on ONE planet, yet some of us call a spade a spade but the USA has to call it a shovel…!

Why can’t we just agree on a singular temperature scale, a solitary unit system for measurement and so on.

I don’t care about your currency systems, keep them. The US Dollar isn’t worth that much these days anyway.

 The EU and the Euro have proven the flaws in that ideal of going to singular currency units for groups of countriess. The fact is Euros may become more valuable one day because they simply may not exist very shortly if any more of the EU countries file bankruptcy.

Sadly though it’s more than weights, more than temperature scales that are missing in the modern USA

I grew up working in the antipodean isles for a US based Hotel chain. We strictly had to observe a code of conduct as designated to us from the corporates in Head Office a billion miles away from our own country. And we were scared to change anything. Five Star hotels worked hard to maintain their ratings and we had such policies as never letting a phone ring more than 3 times, anywhere, anytime, any department. We were even told the words to say upon picking up that phone and the way to handle all customers, via phone, on the fly and face to face from front desk to back of house.

I  have just stayed in “Wysteria Lane” at a top rated and not inexpensive 5 star hotel chain and let me tell you, they certainly did not have the same rating system we had down under.

Upon arrival, room key cards did not work, they did not work the following day either, or the day after that. Bed sheets had been left by the housemaid on the television, not on the bed? I’m not even sure in the end of she changed them or not.

I tried calling my colleagues in another room, the system put me through to the front desk, the front desk operator who did not answer the first four times, eventually told me it’s not their job to take messages and put me through to the in room message system which, you guessed it, put me back through to front desk.

After 25 minutes I gave up and did not care if my colleagues  met me or not.

Perhaps I had a bad week and the hotel had a worse one. But something tells me not. Laundry returned to me was first sent to the wrong room, hotel charges included movies I had never watched and on check out everyone lined up waiting for tips. 
ARE YOU KIDDING ME PEOPLE !!!

Tips in my country are for service !!!

Not for your existence only on my point of exit,  as I load the bags into the car myself!!!

What happened to the super power  who had all the answers and possessed all the standards which everybody else aimed for.

Perhaps with call centers and manufacturing they also sent Common Sense and Professionalism off shore years ago as well.

It’s a real pity . 
I guess Buck Rogers and Battlestar Galactica now have to be made in China with Chinese actors, they seem to be the smartest people of our time and maybe that’s where our future lay.

Instead of Cisco, Janeway and Captain James Tiberius Kirk at the helm of the Enterprise it should have been Juan Hung Lo and his Chinese counterparts.

Let’s get back to the quality standards we set our selves before and let’s get the planet on one line of thinking for all things. 

And please don’t think that I’m bashing America, I just don’t see the sense in double standards for one tiny planet. None of us can agree on religion or politics that I understand, but seriously why can’t we just agree on grams, kilometres and Celsius. 
We are one people , on a singular planet, why must their be multiple answers for the same questions to confuse matters.

It’s bad enough I keep driving on the wrong side of the road.

Live long and prosper  folks.

Life’s Little Orgasm for Hard Workers

O.M.G.

OH MY GOD !!…

I’ve been missing out on something for so long ......and not one of my friends has explained the realities of life to me…Not one of them !

We jokingly referred to it over lunches among the Musketeers but none of us had really experienced it for a long time as we all lived within the confines of the life Bahrain had given us. Few of my local friends could have ever explained it either, many of them had relegated their lives to the Middle East and had lived in the same manner as we did.

But now I’m living a different life for a period of time and these past few days I experienced something more enjoyable than an orgasm….

A two and three day weekend!

If you live in the Western World….right now you have NO IDEA of the joy I’m experiencing.

But for those friends who I left behind in the dessert oasis we call home, let me explain my joy.

First of all the Corporate culture has kidded themselves into believing that they should do something for the environment, being such good people that we are here in Wysteria Lane.

So despite the fact they all drive oversized behemoths of vehicles that chug back gas(petrol) like a thirsty camel, they decided a while back to introduce what is known as a 9/80.

This refers to a 9 day working fortnight (two weeks) whereby you work one hour extra a day and thus by working SO HARD.. and doing 80 hours faster,  you do not need to transit in your vehicle on the tenth day…and of course this saves the environment so much carbon emissions that you have not only gained a 3 day weekend but also saved the planet.

What amazing people.!! (despite the fact everyone this weekend is driving to Santa Monica for the beach which is actually 30 minutes further than work and then the same trip back- the cynic in me fails to see the environment enjoying the difference?)

And does this additional time make everyone more work conscious and more productive? Hell no…!

You see obviously everyone can not take their 9/80 or additional day off on the same day, otherwise the office would be unmanned. So there are heavy days of absences and light ones. I enjoyed the heavy one yesterday when the majority where off and the skeleton crew worked. Well let me use that term lightly.

You see there where so few people there, we could not get the answers to anything we needed , emails went unanswered and unsent and we eventually left early because there was no-one left to worry if we stayed longer or not.

So the fact is, the people on the light days are enjoying an 8 ½ day fortnight.

Many of you in the outside world may enjoy similar lives.

But my closest friends and I have worked  ten days out of twelve fortnight for so long and many of us where even lucky then to even get a singular day off some months. Our particular industry is unrelenting. I have not myself had a two day weekend since the early nineties let alone a three day one.

The two and three day weekend…. Life’s little orgasm for hard workers!

I love corporations and am glad I finally found this existence.

I am a new man. A happy man, and today I am busier….Seriously… I gotta get ready to go to Santa Monica beach, go swimming, have a dinner party tonight at the Vice President of Marketing’s house and tomorrow, well I’ll just kick back and have a long sleep in ……..then contemplate more fun things to do.

I can’t wait to go back to work on Monday and tell everyone how amazing this is…

Needs Versus Wants Versus Everything else !!

Among my previous life with the Four Musketeers, we had one of the team who “wanted” things… all the time !!! But he did not particularly “need” them.

Part of the problem was his new found singular status after a decade of marriage the other was well, we guessed an early onset of mid life crisis !!

My brother, “Porthos” the red haired Musketeer, and I, Aramis (the chubby debonaire Musketeer) would often discuss the subject of needs versus wants, as we watch our friend, D’Artagnan’s life unravel with every dollar spent.

It gets complicated to discuss but pretty much our philosophy was, that in life what we “need” is not always what we “want”, and the same goes vice versa, what we “want” is not always what we “need”.

Okay so that’s simplistic and understated and I’m not just talking about materialistic objects such as laptops and motor bikes  and expensive holidays etc. Each of us could definitely put a strong case forward that we really “wanted” something, but the truth is we rarely do truly “need” it.

I have traveled far and wide myself. There was once, about 100 girlfriends ago, when I felt that I wanted to settle down and have a house for the future. I bought it, filled it with furniture and regretted it every day thereafter. For almost ten years all that furniture sat in storage. I eventually owned one of the most expensive sofas in the world thanks to that decade of wasted storage expenditure.

What I realized then was I “need” very little in my transient lifestyle. I have no “need” or “want” really for expensive furnishings or lavish lifestyles, because I’ll be the first to tell you…I won’t be here long enough to enjoy any of it.

But it’s not even about travel or eventual demise, its really just that I don’t desire to spend hard earnt salary on materialistic objects. You just can not take this stuff with you so why collect it all.

Unless of course you are Tutekhamun !! Now that was quite the collection.

Anyway, I digress yet again.

My reference here is about more than furnishings.

 It’s about love, jobs and everything in between.

You see, there is more than “Needs” and “Wants”; there is also “Challenge”, the unstated human element .

You see , ask yourself the following questions;

Do you want to fall in love…not really !!

Do you need to fall in love…who says ..right ?

So why do we?

Partly it’s because of the challenge of it all. To see if we can in fact woo another party into our lives? To see IF we can live together? To see if we really make a couple or just two people cohabitating with each other?

 And then there’s work ?

Did we ever want to change jobs…. not really!

Did we ever need to change jobs…. Not at all!!

So why!

It was because of the challenge.

The challenge inside of us to prove to self that we still have it ,within us , to do it. To seek a higher plane of understanding and to prove that we’re not that old yet and still can mix it with the young guns of our industry.

Complacency is an easy evil to befriend. “Challenge” on the other hand, is a friend we should all seek out and find, to remind ourselves that we are infact “ALIVE”. Challenge in life heightens our senses and reminds us that we can indeed do anything that we desire.

You may not “Need” to be out of your depth, you may feel that you do not “want” it either.

But let me tell you from experience; to “challenge” yourself, is to find yourself. To awaken that fire that burns within, that flickered close to going out for sometime, and it reminds you, who is truly important to you in the world……….YOU ARE !!!

Live long my friends, Prosper and go get ‘em …

I challenge you !!

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Living In Wysteria Lane !

Perfection !!

Ahhh such a delicious word… I’ve heard it a lot in my life…

Usually about food that I eat!!

But times they change and I awoke yesterday to find myself in a new homeland and perfection abounds.

I’m living in Santa Clarita California, a model community. The roads are wide and handle the traffic easily and smoothly, the transportation systems all work fluidly and on time, the grass is perfect height and groomed to , well, perfection! The flower pots are all aligned in a row and the streets are perfectly swept. There even seem to be a perfect balance between residential, industrial and commercial real estate. This place is absolutely perfect, to the eye!!

Yet sitting at breakfast this morning looking out upon perfection it felt strangely creepy and not real.

A new colleague at work, even asked me how I enjoyed living in “Wysteria Lane” .

He had noted it too!!

To me it feels and looks more like a Hollywood back lot, perhaps that’s the idea, Hollywood is after all only 40 minutes drive away.

You see , in my mind, whilst living in this idealized perfection looks and feels kind of great I’m wise enough to realize that perfection without flaws is just a fantasy.

It is definitely not reality.

Don’t get me wrong, a lot of people have flocked to this place. A few years back only 20,000 people lived here, now over 200,000 people live here. It is idyllic. Kudos to the architects, town planners, city designers and visionaries who conceived the town centre.

And in all essence of this blog I’m not just talking about Santa Clarita, hey I work here, I can think of worse places to go to work every day, but what I’m getting at is as per usual,  loosely based around my love life.

You see for years I sought perfection… I thought I knew what I wanted and after 30 years of trying I’m happy to say I never found it . I fell far short of the mark for three decades.

Now I see it why!!

A beautiful young lady that I’m in love with , is perfect in my eyes today,  because she too has flaws. To me she is reality !!

Absolute reality... and that turns me on.

I can’t believe I missed this for so long. 

And yeh….before you get up in arms or offended by my comment that she has flaws, don’t get me wrong, I have 50 kg of flaws, and I admit them all. But the fact that when we are together neither of us actually notices the flaws tells me something. 

They say beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, and I believe it absolutely.

If you find the one you love and you find true happiness then you see past the flaws and see only the perfection within.

Perhaps “soul mates”, perhaps its just destiny, perhaps love is blind, but I’d much rather live in this reality , than spend an eternity seeking the fantasy of perfection .

Perfection with flaws, in my eyes anyway, equates to the perfect relationship. To consider that perfection can be found without such, is to live in a dream world not even close to reality.

Albert Einstein and I would have been close friends, I’m assured of that, and in respect to the grand master of everything I donate the following mathematical theorum based upon the philosophy above.

A + X = Y

A equals Perfection plus X equalling flaws equate to Reality Y

whilst

A (Perfection) – X (Flaws) = Z (Fantasy)

As always, please feel free to comment and tell me I’m wrong. 

But while you do that, I’m going to write my friend, who I don’t call “Perfection” any longer, but my “Little Miss Gorgeous Reality”!!!

Eat , Pray and Love my friends !!!

EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OKAY !

I love movies!

Not your fluffy Hollywood romance, not your big extravagant Blockbuster, not the movies about sporting successes or exaggerated truths. I'm a fan of Sci-Fi for sure, but they are not, believe it or not the first choice for me. 

I'm a addict of the pain, heart break and desire movies that most of you will run away from. 

Movies that have a hidden message, movies that make me cry in the sanctity, safety and solitude of my own sofa. 

Movies I'm too scared with my fragile heart, to view in public cinemas.

All time favorites include Smilas Sense of Snow, To Gillian on her 32nd Birthday, The Messenger, Remember Me and most recently "THE BEAVER", starring Mel Gibson and Jodie Foster.

I agree, whole heartedly that these are not always your cheery, fun loving, have a ball kind of movies. Sometimes it even takes me 2 or 3 attempts to get through the first viewing. 

They often start slow and are definately not filled with explosions and heart pumping adrenalin. 

What they have is heart and soul and usually a message. 

Sometimes the message is , I believe, directly descended from my own history. Perhaps those who see the vision that the producer had when making such a film can only be viewed and heard because we have all suffered the same issues in life. A broken heart, a parent suffering psychosis, a friend ripped from our lives or simply a momentary bump along life's long road which causes us reflection.

From each of them though I come away different. 

Perhaps it's the outpouring of emotion, perhaps its the thanks that somewhere in the world, to have made this movie, I finally know that there is some body else feeling the same emotional vibrations from the cosmos that I can feel reverberating in my soul.....that feeling, that I am not alone !!!

The following speech is from the final moments of "The Beaver" - "Nora's Gradation Speech" and it connects with me. 

Ask not why or how..... just read!

If it connects with you, then this posting has been a success. 

If it does not, then carry on; richer for having stopped by for a momentary reading of nothing more than words.

The words will always be here and you never know; One day..... you may desire to come back, when you finally feel that "bump" in your own highway of life, when the cosmos vibrates upon your soul disturbing the equilibrium of your previously placid existence.

"Good afternoon, graduates, dead poets, painters,  future Einsteins and all those in between.

Today I’m here to warn you are that you being lied to !

Our parents, our teachers, our doctors have lied to us, and it’s the exact same lie,  the same six words… “Everything is going to be okay”

But what if it isn’t?  

What if some of human experience is just something you inherit, like curly hair or blue eyes?

What if pain is just in your DNA?

And tragedy is your birth right ?

Or what if,  sometimes, right out of the blue, when you least expect it

Shit just happens!

Okay I’m sure you’re all thinking just now, Man; this is the darkest graduation speech I’ve have ever heard. And it is, I agree with you.

But I didn't write it.

I've spent so much time waiting for this lie to come true, that i finally paid someone to tell the truth for me...

“I’m not okay.  Not at all.

The truth is, I’m missing something! The thing I loved the most, the face I wish was in the front row right now. The brother I’ll never get back!

So what do I do with that?

What do any of us, do with that?

Besides lie !

This is what I believe.....

Right now, in this auditorium there is someone who is with you; someone who is willing to pick you up, dust you off, kiss you, forgive you, put up with you, wait for you, carry you, love you….

So while everything may not always be okay, one thing I know is true !

You do not have to be alone!"

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FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS !!!!!

A close friend asked me recently if I believed in the concept of “friends with benefits”, apparently she thought it was a Western concept enjoyed by us all.

I suggested that she stop watching re-runs of “Sex in the City” and understand that everything on television and Hollywood movies was not in fact based upon reality.

Oh how many of us may wish!!

Yet even the best of us can see the complications and jealousy that would rear its ugly head within such a concept also. Perhaps if all emotion, heart and natural human feelings were removed from the process, it would be a possibility, but truly , I do digress, for I do not believe in such  un-realities of the human psyche.

What I want to discuss this blog is the other ideals of my own “Friends with Benefits”.

You see I have truly been blessed with some of the most amazing friendships a human being can possibly afford.

I’m not talking about the amazing people who bless my life on a daily basis, they know how deeply I appreciate their friendship, well I would hope they do !

And I’m not actually talking about the great friends  with whom I have known for in excess of millennia, and if not call or text every few weeks, months or years, I email usually more frequently. We all lead busy professional lives, no one expects immediate replies to emails or texts, but the answers, the emails and the conversations we do have , when they occur, are absolutely heart felt and real. They are the sought of people with whom a life’s journey is a blessing, people with whom you can ask the hardest questions of life; the unexplored emotions and queries that you parents never answered, and only a closest friend of decades can appreciate.

There is also the friendships that have occurred and are cyclical, and these are the ones I call my true “Friends with Benefits”. All friendships have some benefits, secrets kept, things borrowed, others loaned and shoulders on which to cry.

What I adore about the third type of friendships is their unexpectedness and perfection of timing,

Recently I made a big move. It could have been a tough time for me, but out of the blue came my friends. A co-worker from Singapore that I worked with more than 15 years ago emailed me just yesterday and stated that she had remained in the food industry all these years and was now a renowned food photographer. Her email, resolutely confirming that her ambition and some of my early training of her in the food industry, reaped benefits for the world in a fantastic manner.

Another friend, a male colleague I had not heard from in over a decade, yet a single email this week, connected us again like we had never been apart.

Today, a friend from Canada, Facebooked me to apologise for not being there always when I needed assistance, but that times had been tough for my friend as well.

“Friends with benefits”, in the Sex and the City terminology, a guaranteed emotional hell and heart break galore eventually down the track.

“Friends with benefits” in my world, the land of James Claire, where friends don’t always have to be their, they don’t always have to write, they don’t always text or email, but in your heart they are there, emotionally lifting your soul and spirit in times of true need.

With the added  “benefit”, of a fantastic surprise of connection and reminder of how wonderful your life has been to have met them, enjoyed time with them, and to have been there for each other at some time in the past, when finally you meet, call, text, email, facebook or skype each other in the future.

To all my friends, now, past and future, Thank You !!

Your love, kindness and friendship is the greatest benefit any life could ever ask for!!

The Happiness of Self

In the words of Lao-Tzu the sixth century founder of Taoism, ”a journey of a thousand li starts with a single step.”

So there is was sitting in the lobby of my hotel awaiting to leave to my next destination…a glass of 30 year old malt in one hand, over ice, and a dragon fruit in the other, well, it was actually 2 dragon fruits, both sliced and plated from the breakfast buffet.

And before you go on about my choice of beverage at breakfast, just know that its better than the diet I got used to previously… no milk available I was actually reduced to coco pops and muesli and in the absence of milk I invented a concoction of vodka and coffee mate. Let me tell you, it’s a hell of a way to start the day!

Anyway, so it got me thinking. The flavors where amazing. Theologian and writer James Claire just wanted to don a chefs uniform then and there, and make a dessert from this collective of dragon fruit and its seeded glory in both white and purple and the flavor of the beverage at hand. Together they were stunning, and I could make a delicious and stunning dessert from them. I wanted to give up writing for while and just cook.

A friend of mine, who is a chef, has recently discussed giving it all up to find a permanent career in writing and journalism. He is a great writer after all, but its a big issue at mid life to change direction like that.

Then there is the case of a certain young lady that means a lot to me. She loves my nose, my eye colour and my white skin.

I adore her eyes, her dark hair and her nose and especially the golden caramelised colour of her skin.

You see, we are all the same!! No matter what we have, we all seem to want something else.

Some of us stay indoors scared to have the suns rays touch our skin for fear it makes us darker , others can’t get enough of the sun, its rays or anything that will darken us, tanning beds, tanning booths and spray tans to name a few.

I know friends who use whitening creams, powders and bleaches to remove what most of us seem to spend a fortune trying to brown up.

Why is it that we are never happy ?

A certain friend of recent past, constantly said her father complained and picked at little things, but she could not see that “SHE” was exactly the same.

Not a day went by when she was not complaining about something, usually to do with me. Had she just conceded to a life of happiness she would have seen that she has a great job, an amazing life, an amazing future and someone that loved her no matter what.

But before we find happiness there is one thing more important that we need to do… In the words or Lao-Tzu, “a single step”.

We need to love…

And I don’t mean others… the depth of love we should have is not for others, friends, lovers or companions, but for ourselves.

If you do not love yourself, if you are not comfortable in your own skin, if you can not look in the mirror and be proud and content, then how are you ever suppose to love another or be loved.

We were never all meant to be superstars, some where born with the DNA of models, many are not. But does that make us lesser people. Hell no !

I was born with the DNA of a “hippo”, my friend with the DNA of pastry chef, both of us are large guys. And not much to look at. But one thing we both actually have in common is that we are comfortable within our own skin. People can call me fat and I agree.

Does it mean I will lose weight immediately, I doubt it. Sometime in the future I will need to for age and medical reasons, but will I do it for the cosmetic purposes for another person. Why should I.!

I love myself and I don’t see reason to change for anything.

True love is to look past someone’s pitfalls and to see the beauty inside of the soul. That’s why perfect partners are often called “soul mates.” There are times when we have all seen a couple who look mismatched according to our stereotypical expectations, but the couple are so happy together. They probably can’t tell you why, just that they are absolutely in love with the other person.

Now that’s love?

We need to learn to be happy with what our lot is in life.

There are so many others, billions in fact who would swap with each us in a heart beat, for there’s truly is a tough existence.

Love what you are, love who you are and love doing what you do. The grass always seems greener on the other side, every job seems to have it easier than the one each of us has, but life could be much worse.

The bank account, the fashion sense and the social status of a person is no indication at all as to the one you think you’re loving.

Love yourself first and foremost. If others can’t love what and who are on first sight, then take a pass.

Love should be more than skin deep. Look at the soul, the heart and the ideals of a person and you will find a truly beautiful human being to spend time with.

If we can learn to love ourselves, it would stop us being envious of others too. There would be less fighting in the world, less squabbles and less desire to win at all costs.

Love can change the world, but it’s ourselves who must be the centre of our own attention first, or else everything else is superfluous.

In the Declaration of Independence of the United States of America of 1776 it is stated, “all men are created equal. They are endowed by the Creator with certain inalienable rights, among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.”

So if we are all created equal, why do some of us think they are better than others? Why do some such as my recent friend find it easy to tell me how to better myself? Why do we all try to be what we are not or why do some try to deny where they were born and why do others in foreign lands fight each other over disagreements of how each should live?

Lao-Tzu’s words of , ”a journey of a thousand li starts with a single step”, should be  our first consideration before we hurt another with words, fists or arms.

We are all born equal !

If as a “first step”,  we learnt to love ourselves and respect ourselves, we might see that we are equal! But whilst we remain unloved to ourselves, we shall always find things in others that make us envious or crazed.

Lets start this long journey to world peace and true happiness with a single step – self love, self appreciation and self reflection. Then we will see that we are indeed created equal and deserve love, life and happiness as equals, each and every one of us.

Anyway, till then, I’m off to write some more. I’ve eaten the dragon fruit and thrown back the beverage, I’ll send the dessert concept to my friend the chef and tell him to cook it. Food is what he does best, and we love him for that.

Besides, writing is not as easy as one thinks, the breakfasts alone can make you tired.